Valuable Mistakes

I have finished the first two weeks of my course, and I've learned a ton.  It's been as intense as I thought it would be, but the next two weeks promise to be even worse. Our teaching segments will now start becoming longer, and we will be switching from teaching the beginner class to an intermediate class.  This is pretty overwhelming for me and my classmates.  I personally think it's going to be brutal.  I wish I could say that I've learned all that I wanted to learn, but unfortunately I can't.  And I don't think I will learn what I really want to learn by the end of the course, that being specifically how to teach grammar. I do wonder if I'll be able to really teach English, at least effectively, after this course is done.  While we are learning some handy tools to take into a classroom (such as analyzing parts and functions of speech, how to deliver appropriate concept checking questions, how to use visual aids and board work, lesson planning and unit planning, receptive skills and listening, error correction, and even a bit of standard english phonology), I am still unable to teach anything close to grammar, verb tenses, and their reasons for being.  Can anyone tell me why, exactly, we use a past continuous tense instead of a simple past tense when we talk?  For us native speakers, English is intutive.  We don't know why we say things the way we do, we just say them!  I was hoping to be specifically shown how to format a lesson to teach these very difficult concepts, but that's not going to happen.  So I'm trying not to panick.  I know that most teachers take a lot of time to perfect their skills, and so will I.  But I must admit that it's scaring the crap out of me!

from left: Lena, Mi Nu, Trish, Chris, and me

I really dig my classmates.  We are all so different, but working so closely everyday means that you automatically bond with one another.  It's quite the process. We make mistakes in front of one another and all our egos go out the door.  But we learn from one another's mistakes, and from our own. 

Why are mistakes so good to make?  My classmates and I have discovered that getting it all wrong is a part of getting it all right!  Think about it: how do you learn to ride a bike?  Heck, you don't just get on and go!  You have to fall off a lot, bump into things, and probably hurt yourself a little (at least I remember it that way).  But you get back on and you try again, and before you know it you can ride a bike.  So why do we look at life's lessons any differently?  I'm not just talking about learning a new skill.  I'm talking about human nature, I'm talking about relationships.  We can beat ourselves up all we want for having made a mistake, but at the end of the day haven't we just learned something valuable?  How else could we gain experience and knowledge in life without having had an experiment go wrong?  How else could we really learn to define ourselves?

I've made so many mistakes in my life that I can't count them.  Some of my mistakes have hurt others.  While I'm not knowingly walking around stomping on other people's hearts, sometimes someone gets hurt during my process.  I know I hurt my ex-husband many times.  I think I've hurt my family.  I have most likely hurt some of my closest friends.  Isn't it funny how we always hurt the ones we love?  But thank goodness for mistakes!  Thank goodness that I've had the chance to learn from them.  Would I do things the same way again?  Nope.  There is a deep change happening within me, and its not easy to define.  But I'm not the same person I was a year ago.  I'm not anywhere close to being that person.  And I am glad about it.  I've learned from my mistakes.

I have slowly been getting back in touch with some of my girlfriends. One by one I'm starting to reach out.  I feel their warm arms around me and I remember how blessed I am to have such a fantastic array of exciting, beautiful, and diverse ladies in my midst to call friends. 

I did actually end up going out last night!  My good friend Danielle emailed me a couple of nights ago and suggested we go dancing, and as I'd gotten a good handle on my course assignments, I decided to join her.  Danielle and I are ex-sister-in-laws.  To be more precise, our ex-husbands are brothers.  Both of our marriages fell apart almost at the same time. But now her and I have replaced those relationships with what to me feels like a really nice friendship.  She is a kindred spirit, a fairy in her own right.  Danielle and I haven't always been close, in fact we never used to be friends at all even though we used to share the same family.  We definitely had a rough start to our relationship.  But water has drifted under the bridge, and time heals all wounds.  The mistakes we made with one another have now transformed into wisdom, respect, and friendship.  I am thankful for her spunky spirit, and her encouraging, optimistic view on life!  She is one of the only single gal-pals I have left, and she shares the same joy and enthusiasm for dancing and good music as I do.  She is a sex-kitten, and she is Trouble with a capital T.  I love it!  I can't share all the photos, because frankly she is way too NAUGHTY to show you the majority of them!  ha!  But I am including a few "tasteful" ones here.  Danielle, an Aries, has a ton of energy and can keep on going for hours longer than I can.  Hope you had fun at Gorg, D! 

Thank goodness someone can be naughtier than me!!  ha!

The music has always been good at Celebrities on Friday nights - last night Max Graham was playing.  Although some consider him a bit of a "hit 'n' miss" DJ, last night was great fun and he was definitely on his game.  The best part about last night was that it was mostly very unplanned and spontaneous!  Sometimes those make for the most memorable nights.  :) 

Three cheers for mischievous Fairies!  Hip Hip...!

Today was a beautiful day in Vancouver!  Days like today remind everyone why we choose to live here instead of somewhere farther east.  At 12 degrees and not a cloud in the sky, everyone was out and I also wasn't about to let the day pass me by either.  Of course I took my camera with me.

I grabbed a Starbucks soy hot chocolate and took to Locarno Beach to enjoy the fresh air, sunshine, and beautiful scenery of the city. 

Check out this little video I took, and then you too will remember why you like it here:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_6vgZvZWf60

I am thankful to have had enough time to write in my blog today, or even to write at all while I'm taking the TESL course.  I know I'm unable to get into my writing in a serious way right now, but it still feels great just being able to post something.  Anything. 

Here's another video I took today, driving through Vancouver.  It's a little bit longer but if you've never been to Vancouver before, now you'll feel like you have! 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wB3VSWoYnIE

Tonight I am going to clean Mark's house for him, since I am taking care of his place afterall and the dust bunnies are starting to pile up!  I know, it's an exciting life I lead, eh?  But then later on I'm going to enjoy a skype call with my man, Ries, and that is definitely exciting!  Tomorrow morrning I'm going to go for a run with my classmate, Trish.  It'll be our last 40 minute run before we up it to 45.  It's nice to be running again, and even nicer to have someone to run with! We've decided we're going to make it a Tuesday/Thursday/Sunday thing, and it's motivating to know that someone will be there to run with even if it's pouring rain outside.  Then tomorrow afternoon I will be hitting the books again, reading and developing a lesson plan for a grammar class on the past tenses.  Yep, that's pretty much my life in a nutshell.  But even with the mistakes, I am enjoying it.

Charleen xo